Haven’t we all been thoughtlessly spewing phrases after phrases of vulgarities for the most insignificant reasons? I’m sure that almost every one of you faggots has had experience using such obscene terms, and surely the most prevalent and atrocious profanity of the decade would be fuck. It’s an interesting term that has it original, unpleasant meaning eroded as people get so desensitized by hearing it everywhere that they treat it as just another umbrella term like shit. This MOFO has definitely proliferated a crazy number of cultures worldwide. I hear or see the damn word everyday.
So what sparked this post was a text I perceived to be neutral and innocuous, that I sent to my male friend.
Me: “FUCK, I just smashed a fly on my phone.”
Him: “Dude you don’t have to use vulgarities.”
Sounds like a fairly simple exchange, but because i’m a hyper-sensitive person who always over-thinks, I kept this short conversation in the back of my mind.
Let it be known that these are simply my conjectures and reasonings that make sense to me. Vulgarities, even if used without any malicious intent, will never be neutral or innocuous because of its inherent nature which incites strong and raging emotions in others. Maybe it stems from the very word itself, with such profane utterances innately having harsh stresses, so there’s a burst of both cathartic and vehement elements that comes with shouting out the word. Or maybe it’s because most of these terms (e.g dickhead, bitch) already have disparaging and cruel meanings attached to them.
I get that most people (my age, at least) now adopt a mild tolerance for vulgarities since vulgar culture has successfully permeated our society and desensitized us all. We don’t think it’s insidious, and we don’t think that calling our closest friend a bitch is rage-inducing. Conversely, bitch is even used as a term of endearment. Furthermore, it’s extremely cathartic to spam profanities, and there’s a thrilling sense of solidarity whenever a group of girls come together to cuss. Nevertheless, there will be a nagging voice in the back of my mind and making me feel bad about swearing.
And it’s because it’s so easy to fall into the habit of incorporating vulgarities into your everyday vocabulary, that you can’t even express your annoyance and anger in a phrase other than “fuck this shit”. Your thoughts, be it when you’re awestruck, impressed, upset, or disgusted, will be encapsulated by the single word “damn”. I’m pretty sure you can witness for yourself the startling extent to which vulgarities rob your vocabulary. It certainly has done a lot of damage to me, in conversational dialogue at least. Cussing in writing is a different matter altogether.
So now i’ve got the reasons not to swear out of the way. Basically there’s no point in limiting yourself to phrases with intrinsically hateful meanings, and risk rising tensions and tipping people over. It’s easier to get emotional and angry when you’re using angry words. Now let’s get back to my story and the terrible gender stereotypes and expectations. Why can guys swear so freely without a care, and then tell girls to stop swearing?
So the same male friend chanced upon a picture I drew of some guy sticking out his middle finger (pardon my crudeness please). He then told me, “Never knew you were so vulgar.” At this point I was quite sad, because I liked this friend and I had been careful not to use any vulgar terms in front of him IRL because I guess he just was the good sort of guy who frowned upon the usage of vulgarities. BUT THEN I REALIZED, DUDE, our mutual MALE friends have been cussing right in front of our faces all the time, and you don’t stop them! Why does a vulgarity become shocking and distasteful when a girl uses it?!
Gender discrimination wooooooo. Differing expectations where girls are supposed to be more gentle and innocent. I finally confronted my friend we did agree on this discrepancy in judgement, where not just swearing, but explicit sexual references by the guys were acceptable. But comprehending that we should have equal standards obviously does not equate to what is right in the eyes of society, since the ignorant, collective voice of society can label us rebellious females as an anomaly to this very arbitrary and disgusting social standard that y’all mindless human herd adhere to. I’m obviously joking. But seriously, as much of an anti-conformist I am, I believe that sticking to society’s expectations does have its good. Furthermore, it’s not the case that swearing by girls should be accepted; it’s swearing by both sexes that should be unacceptable.
There’s a reason why in language as a whole, there’s a small subset for vulgarities, which is labelled as taboo. These words impede creativity and promote hot-headedness, and they’re probably a fleeting slang for youths like me. As we mature, hopefully we can keep our language in check.
Meanwhile in my head: F****** EXAMS START NEXT WEEK! F***! HAVEN’T EVEN STARTED STUDYING ECONS!
(Decode: FEARFUL EXAMS START NEXT WEEK! FOUR!)